Let me start off by saying, hellllllooo and welcome! I decided to start this blog all because of my son Logan. Bless his little 2 year old heart. We were on vacation a few months ago and I had my first mommy meltdown. We vacation every year with my Mommy (yes, I’m 33 and still call her that) Pops, sister, Godmother, her daughters, and for a few days my husband joins us at the beach for a week. The infamous day I’m talking about is the day after my husband and Pops left, and the day before my sister (a.k.a. baby whisperer) arrived. Logan was definitely testing his limits with me after his dad left for home. He wasn’t listening and he was showing off for my Godmother and her daughters. This was the first time he got in my face and screamed, “nooooo!” to a request I made, followed by a push before running away to play with his Nana. A few other incidents took place before I felt myself ready to scream, and the tears started to stream down my face. Luckily, my Mommy was there and came to my rescue. I literally locked myself in the bathroom and cried. I felt like such a failure as a Mom. The negative thoughts poured through my brain starting with “I’m a terrible Mom. I can’t even control my own son.” I’m telling you right now,  you are not a terrible parent! Not if you love your children and want the best for them! Bad days are allowed. I’m starting to finally realize…

I was definitely one of those, “my kids won’t do that” type of people prior to actually giving birth! It’s so funny how we think our lives will turn out, the plans that we make that go awry, or how our future children will behave. I always thought I would be the ‘cool mom.’ Not too crunchy and not too strict, but I would still have rules in place that of course my calm child(ren) would follow.

September 2015 – *Enters Logan. (Thank you, God!)

My how my world changed. This tiny human was my responsibility. It’s no wonder the term, “Motherhood, Winging it” has come to be so well known! The things that came natural to me also scared me. How did I know what to do, and when to do it? I struggled with some things as all new moms do, but I’m so blessed to have such an amazing support system and partner in my husband. Honey, I love you and you’re amazing.  Logan was a pretty easy baby. Of  course there were long nights and early mornings (welcome to parenthood, folks) but as far as babies go, he was a lover of the 4Moms Mamaroo swing (shout out and thank you) and we thought we had the unicorn of babies. Fast forward to age two. Holy cow! Nothing can prepare you for the firecracker that is toddler-hood. My son is still extremely sweet and well mannered, but Lord have mercy his attitude comes… well, it comes straight from his mom (dang it)! The independence that kids reach at such a young age is astonishing. Their personalities start to bloom and they are able to tell you what they want, and how they want it. I guess knowing this should have prepared me for that day at the beach. The day Logan decided to really test his limits on Mom.

The mommy meltdown was real. The struggle that day was real. I’m sure there will be more meltdowns along the way, but you know what? Life is hard. Parenting is hard. Things really suck sometimes, but most of the time we come out on the other side of it and we learn something and grow. Remember that. You are entitled to a bad day. We all have them, and that’s okay. There are days when Netflix is my savior with my son, and others where I can’t get enough snuggies (a.k.a. hugs) from him. Life is about balance and it’s so important to have time for yourself. You can’t pour from an empty cup. Self care is so important. It revitalizes you and makes you a better spouse, parent, daughter, and friend.

Remember, it’s just a bad day, not a bad life.

It really turned out to be a great vacation. Thanks for the challenge, my sweet boy!

Xo,

Marisa